To be Human
by An Ordinary Riceball
Summary: At seeing Canada in such a dreadful state, France swore to himself that, even if he couldn't always be there for Canada as France, he would most certainly be there for Matthieu as Francis. After all, that's 'being human' was, and he would always have that human instinct which told him being there for Matthieu right now was definitely the right thing to do. Self Harm/Cutting


_**Story: To be Human**_

 _ **Summary:**_ _ **At seeing Canada in such a dreadful state, France swore to himself that, even if he couldn't always be there for Canada as France, he would most certainly be there for Matthieu as Francis. After all, that's 'being human' was, and he would always have that human instinct which told him being there for Matthieu right now was definitely the right thing to do.**_

 _ **Warnings: Self Harm, Cutting, and Human Names (obviously).**_

 _ **Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia. How unfortunate… ;_;**_

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Canada frantically ran into his bathroom, and slid down against the wall, falling to the floor. Bangs covering his eyes, he couldn't stop the tears from quickly traveling down his cheeks, as he quickly pulled something out of his hoodie pocket, rolling up his sleeve to reveal many open cuts, and self-inflicted scars, which filled his arm. Pressing a sharp razor into his wrist, he slowly drug it up the once smooth skin, re-opening several cuts. He repeated the process over and over. He continued crying, not focused on his surroundings anymore, but rather the fact of having to relive the same mental struggle everyday. The sharp, yet satisfying, pain seemed to calm him down, at least a little. Studying the dark crimson liquid seeping out of the new, and fairly deep, cuts, he watched while it rushed down to his elbow dripping on the cold surface of the floor beneath him.

"C-Canada…? Mon dieu…!"

His blood ran cold and he froze, suddenly realizing he'd been so out of it that he hadn't even thought to lock the door, and not fully close it. And not only that, but there were also a few people he'd for some reason or another gave a copy of his house key. At this moment, however, he truly wished he hadn't.

He couldn't say anything - could barely _breathe_ , even - when he looked up to see his 'Papa' standing there, an extremely shocked and devastated look on his face, before he shakily looked away, ashamed. France then came over, gently pulling the razor from his grip. He immediately expected to be scolded, and grew very tense, as France's hand made contact with his shoulder. However, he suddenly found himself unable to stop crying when he was pulled into a very soft, but warm embrace. Laying his forehead into the Frenchman's chest, uncontrollable sobs began wracking his body. Unshed tears threatened to fall from lighter blonde's eyes, moisture clinging to his eyelashes, but all the while, he pushed them back, holding the trembling Canadian in his arms, as if letting go of him would cause him to disappear forever.

"W-why? Why does it all hurt so bad, France...? Why can't we all be born human...?!" Canada finally choked out after a long tear-filled silence. "I just wish I could disappear... Barely anybody can see me, and hardly even notices my presence, or seems to know who I am... And the only time they people _do_ see me is when they mistake me for _America_ , and I end up getting beaten up and cursed every single time. Being a nation sucks, so why...?!"

"The burden that some of us nations carry is strong at times… It's really taken its toll on you, though, hasn't it…?" France let out a soft pained laugh, when uncharacteristic tears made their way to the corners of his eyes. " _Dieu_ … _Je suis vraiment désolé_ … I never knew… I promise I'll find a way to fix this…"

"No, Papa. This is my problem to deal with. I don't want to burden you like that."

"Non... Non... You're not a burden at all, _mon petite Matthieu._ "

At seeing Canada in such a dreadful state, France immediately swore to himself that he would be there be for from then on, no matter what. As long as he lived, he knew that the younger blonde would never truly be fixed, just as he _himself_ would never truly be without a crack here and there. However, even _so_ , while, _yes_ , they _were_ nations, they were also _human._ Even if he couldn't always be there for Canada as _France_ , he would most certainly be there for _Matthieu_ as _Francis_. After all, that's 'being human' was, and he would always have that human instinct which told him being there for Matthieu right now was definitely the right thing to do.

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 _ **~ Fin**_

 _ **Translations (correct me if I'm wrong) -**_

 _ ** _Dieu_ … _Je suis vraiment désolé - God... I'm so truly sorry._**_

 ** _Mon petite Matthieu - My little Matthieu_**

 ** _Mon dieu...! - My God...!_**

* * *

 _ **A/N: I don't really like this that much, but it's been on my Hard Drive, like, forever, so yah… Anyway, I hope you liked it, and SELF HARM, OF ANY FORM, IS NOT GOOD. If you have – or**_ **have** _ **had- a problem with Self Harm, I encourage you to**_ **try** _ **to stop, and to encourage others to avoid it as well. A while back, I watched Amanda Todd's last video before she'd committed suicide, and I was so angry at seeing all the hateful comments that were STILL being posted**_ **AFTER she was already gone.** _ **And it makes me think,**_ **I don't give a damn others what others have said or will say, but I truly wish I could've met her before she died. Then, just maybe, she might've still been here, and wouldn't have been 'killed' all due to some** _ **cowardice**_ **rumors that were spread out by** _ **cowards.**_ **That's all I have to say.**

 **Anyway, on a more cheerful note, thank you for reading, as always, minna~! Nipaaah~!**

 **(((Review...? Bitte…?)))**


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